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A few observations:

  1. Yay skulls!
  2. It’s like 16 candles, except it’s 13 and it’s skulls, because Halloween.
  3. Halloween is the meemos’ favorite holiday. The more you know.
  4. Adding cleavage to any Halloween costume automatically makes it sexy.
  5. But seriously, when did Halloween become “sexy?” What happened to scary? I liked scary. I’m bringing scary back. I don’t care what you say.
  6. Pumpkin cookies won this, I think. Or maybe buns. Pumpkin candy sounds abominable. Your thoughts?
  7. I totally ran out of candy though, and I’m v. mad about that.
  8. Happy Halloween.

Hi! So, some things:

  1. These are the recipes for the Cuke Off dishes - the fan-food thing I did for Cucumber Quest.
  2. The seitan recipe was adapted from here. I’ve never made seitan before, so…caveat emptor (eator?) I guess.
  3. In case anyone doesn’t know, sweating means to cook aromatics (onion, garlic, etc.) in oil on medium-low heat until they start to “sweat,” or release a bit of water. I might make a post about this later.
  4. Also, a lowercase t means teaspoon, while an uppercase T means tablespoon. I got lazy and abbreviated some stuff - sorry.
  5. If you make any of these dishes, I’d love to know about it. Maybe post a photo or something?
  6. Don’t make the aspic loaf. Just…nobody wants to eat that. For stubborn completionists (it’s ok, I get it), you’ll need one of these to make the foam. But seriously, don’t. It’s gross, you guys.

Thanks for reading! And thanks so much to everyone who enjoyed the Cuke Off. If you have any questions about the recipes, or if you made something delicious (or, you know, horrible) please feel free to let me know. The meemos and I are here to help you! If you want, you can follow me on Twitter and visit the website,, for larger versions of everything.

I drew some fan food for my sister’s comic. Everyone should go read it. It’s really cute.


TPOTS Menu - Now With Visibility

What the heck, Tumblr? That file size is unacceptably tiny. I mean, you can’t even see the marzipan bee for goodness’ sake. I’m not angry, Tumblr - just disappointed. Anyway, there’s a much bigger version of my (*ahem, winning*) entry for the FOTK recipe contest now up on the website, for your enjoyment. Go. Absorb:


Recipe Contest

Hi. It’s me. I’m back. There’s a recipe contest going on over at Ellen Kushner’s Livejournal, and I thought I’d get in on the action. The challenge was to create a recipe or menu inspired by one of Ms. Kushner’s “Riverside” books. Mine is from The Privilege of the Sword. There’s a free download of the new The Fall of the Kings audiobook at stake, but to tell you the truth, I just wanted an excuse to make book food. May the best crazed fan win.

My Entry:

Just the text, ma’am? Here you go:

New Year’s Picnic at Highcombe: A Menu (Adapted from The Privilege of the Sword, by Ellen Kushner)

Main Course

Cheese (Queso de Cabrales: A Spanish artisanal, semi-hard blue cheese made from blended sheep and goat’s milk. This cheese has a bold, piquant flavor, and pairs excellently with both fish and fowl. It definitely has something “odd” in it!)

Bread* (Wild Yeast Pumpernickel: A heavy rye loaf that evokes the cozy warmth of winter holidays with each bite. Richly flavored with spices, honey, and molasses. *We imagine, though there was no mention of it in the book, that the Duke wouldn’t be so coarse as to forget to bring bread for the meal.)

Fish (Arkenveldtian Salt-Cured Salmon Fillets: Wild-caught by intrepid Arkenveldtian fishermen, of course. This delicacy has a creamy texture and mild flavor. Exotically spiced with cardamom and mace, and garnished with a bough of sweet thyme from Kyros.)

Smoked Goose (Aged Smoked Wild Goose: A whole bird, carefully aged and cold-smoked over oak, juniper boughs, and just enough Northern peat moss to be dangerous. Rich and buttery with an unusually generous amount of intramuscular marbling. Flavored with black peppercorns and brandy.)


Anise Wafers (Anise and Saffron Pizzelles: Pizzelles are thin, Italian wafers, pressed with a decorative iron into lovely, slightly crispy medallions. These pizzelles are flavored with stone ground anise and saffron.)

Candied Fruit (Candied Mixed Fruit & Succade: A colorful mélange of preserved sweet cherries, figs, quinces, plums, and red and black currants. Tangy curls of ginger, orange, and citron succade add a delightful kick.)

Cakes - (Honey Spice Cakes: dark, wintry, and delicious, these miniature cakes are flavored with cinnamon, cloves, and a bright pop of lemon zest. They are cut into enchanting shapes and decorated with marzipan and spun sugar.)

Table Wine (Pinot Noir: This ancient, difficult to cultivate light red is silky and complex, yet delicate at heart - just like the Duke. It has floral, herbal, and fruity notes, and is marvelous with rich fish and fowl.)

Dessert Wine #1 (Moscato Ice Wine: This sweet, delicate white with the bright, summery, floral notes of muscat grapes has a vintage legacy dating back to Roman times. It might have been selected by the Duke to accompany his candied fruit and wafers.)

Dessert Wine #2 (Aged Tawny Port: A late-harvest, fortified red with a nutty, caramel-like aroma, accented by ripe, deep notes of winter fruit. A perfect accompaniment for Honey Spice Cakes.)